Oreos and The Carpenters

Well, 'tis Saturday, and right now I listening to The Carpenters. Now, if you have never heard of them, I don't blame you because they are a pretty old band/artist, but the lady singer has such a good voice! Dang! Anyway, whilst I was listening to the sereneness of the Carpenters, I found some Oreos! Yes! I love it when that happens because finding Oreos in our house is pretty much impossible.
Today, however, I am going to tell you the amazing tale of the Rebecca the Rice Krispy. She was, like all rice krispies, made and packaged in the Kellogg's factory. When all the rice krispies got stuck in the box, they started talking to each other through the thin outer layer around all of them. Steve said, "Yes! We are all going to the store! I hope that we get to go to Wal-Mart!" "Wal-Mart? Lame! I want to go to somewhere useful, like Haiti or something." says Nathan the rice krispy. "Actually, I would like to end up in Paris. I have always wanted to go to France." The talk continued in this manner until they all fell asleep. That is when the truck carrying the treats hit a fateful BUMP in the road and the box containing Rebecca the Rice Krispy and her fellow friends fell out and it flew into the forest right along side the road.
All the snacks of course woke up and screamed in agony as they realized what had happened. "We will all sit here and rot to pieces instead of being eaten!" (Rice Krispies are in fact really weird, because all they want to do with their lives is get eaten.) But Rebecca wouldn't stand for that. "Everyone! Stop your useless babbling and let's try to get out of this precarious situation! Nathan and Steve, you work on opening the box, Susan and Peter, you start rounding everyone up so we can all escape together!" So you see that Rebecca had a natural leading streak in her. But, it was all in vain. For that night, it rained.
The rain soaked the box that held them all dug it's fingers into their protective aluminum covering and creeped it's way into all the krispies. Water is the only thing that can effectively destroy a rice krispy and it did just that. Rebecca the Rice Krispy and all her friends, Peter, Susan, Nathan, Steve, etc. died a slow, cold death.
So if you find a wet, ragged looking box of Rice Krispies on the side of the road in a forest, pick it up gently, realize the tragedy of the whole thing, and simply take a trip with it to your neighborhood Wal-Mart, then a tour of Paris, then to a service expedition to Haiti. This will complete the krispies' wishes even in death. (Plus it give you a good excuse to go to two of those three places!)
The End!

The Dark and the Dreary

Today, I feel like being really dramatic and over the top about life. To do so, I will write poetry, for poetry is the way of saying what you need to say about anything, but you make it sound more serious then it really is. So, here goes...
Life's a simple game with thousands of people playing
No one knows the rules, and the prize is up for taking
Some people relax and let the game overtake them,
Others fight and stumble in it as it darkens over them.
But, there are few, that pull out their sword and honor
that fight with strength and renewed pure vigor
They conquer this game that kills so many
and return in victory to their Master, the king of all and any
Ok, not very good perhaps, but deep. If you don't get it, just try and stuff. This is Krista the poet, over and out!

High

Oh gracious. I am high. Like really. Ok, not that bad, but I was painting my room right (Lauree, you should be so proud of me! I actually painted it! Pictures coming soon!) and so it smells alot like paint in there, and then last night, I didn't really want to sleep anywhere else, so I slept in my fume-filled room, and now I am high. (Dude, I used a bunch of commas in that sentence. Wow.) Anyway, that is all I want to say now, so if you talk to me tomorrow and I act kinda strange (stranger than normal :)) that is the reason why.

YEAH AMERICAN!

Wa-Hoo! Mister Evan Lysacek won the GOLD!! He beat the evil cocky Russian man! It is sooo happy! I can't wait to see the medal ceremony where he has to stand in the silver spot and there's Master Evan on the gold! HA HA! In your face! Teach you to be "When I win my medal" Ha! Anyway. I just had to get that out... :)

Erasers

What would the world be without erasers? We would be stuck in a world of mistakes and messy whiteboards. Ultimately it would very much stink. Plus, thy smell really good so you would have one less thing yummy to smell.
So today I am going to write about the Olympics! They are the coolest thing ever you know! I just wish they didn't happen at eleven because it isn't late enough for me to go to bed and watch in the morning, but still late enough to make me only sleep about five hours every night. Which is, by the way, not enough! But last night I watched mister Shaun White go crazy on the pike thing and wow! That dude is super amazing! I think that would be so fun to snowboard like that, but at the same time it would be really scary. What if, while you were up there, your foot itched? You couldn't do anything because you would die if you tried to scratch it! Tonight, I am so excited to watch the mens skating. Now I know there is alot of talk about how those men are gay and whatnot, well MOST of them are straight. And they are so buff!! Wow! It takes a true man to ice skate like those dudes do. But, that one American guy is really gay. Wow. He is flipping his hair and waving his little pink nails all over the place. When he (she?) was sitting waiting for his score, he was like "Hi Krista! I love you. I miss you!" oh dear. I promise that he is not referring to Krista Larsen. It was kinda freaky though all the same. I only know one gay guy, so it wasn't me. Anyway, off to watch the Olympics again! Go mister American dude that I can't remember his name. It like Rovechek or something. I just want someone to beat that Russian cocky rudder-nose dude.

Fail...

Fail. My day today was ultimately a failure. Well, not really. But when you read that you thought that I was going to be depressed and sad and that this would be a lousy post to read, huh. Well, not so! Actually, I had a pretty fun day. I woke up at 10:20! (My personal best time, I know that that isn't really very good, but hey! I get my triumphs in weird places. :)) After that, I tried to make an origami dragonfly, and that was FAIL, then I tried my luck with a penguin and I FAILED again, but I got consolation in crumpling both of them up and chucking them at my brother, so... That's when we (me and mi familia) went bowling. Ok, my score was a grand total of 40. 40 points! FAIL! But, I really had a good time and I almost hit a pin every frame WITHOUT the bumpers! Yeah! Now, I am going to clean my room. FAIL in advance because I will probably get distracted and end up throwing it all in my closet.

Bright Blue and Dazzling

Bright Blue and Dazzling...it makes you want to go to the ocean huh. Well, I do. Man, I have fallen in love with the ocean! I know that a lot of poets and stuff say the a lot, but it is so true! You know when there is someone that you really like and you think about them so much, that every time you do, your heart gets all filled up with longing, wishing to see them again. Well, that is how I feel about the ocean! I just want to smell it, feel it, run in it! Oh, wouldn't it be so fun just to live there! On the coast, have a boat, go fishing everyday just for fun. Grab a wetsuit and dive in! See all the little fishies and swim with the sharks! Then you surface, and smell like salt, and your skin is all soft from it. Then you can go and grab some food, and walk along the coast without any shoes on and the wind slightly blowing and you can dig your toes in the sand. You could search for little shells and crabs and maybe see a wild dolpin or seal. Oh, I love seals! They are my all time bestest favorite animal! They are so cute and barky and you just want to play with them and jump on their blubber bellies! And I love the way they waddle around on their little flippers! And on the coast, you could lay on the sand and listen to the waves roll in and out and in and out. Oh, it would just be a paradise. So much adventure with just the right amount of relaxing too. *Sigh*

Simplicity

I mostly just called this post Simplicity because I love that word. Just say it over and over again. It sounds like you are going to listen to Indian Flute music while walking in Antarctica with the penguins watching the Northern Light above you and then the whales come up and flip and blow those big clouds into the air.
Well, instead of boring you with the events of today, I shall instead tell you my day in super exaggerated form! Yeah! I awoke this morning and slugged over to the TV to watch Sock-tastic' (Tis a show all about the effect of socks on millions of people around the world) and then when my tummy rumbled, I walked upstairs to eat some grub. I was going to get some Crusty-Os for cereal when BA-BOOMAGEFLIDDERWHOMPERDOODLEWHANG! A sound so cantankerous it shook the cereal box right out of my hand! I ranned to see what could of possibly made that sound and then, I saw it! It was the most horrendous, disgusting, vial thing I had ever seen. It was a man with the longest, curliest, hugest, darkest eyebrows known to mankind! They were totally and completely nasty! They traveled down his eye line to the holes in his nose and they did a loop-de-doop sort of thing around his nose and went back up to make a circle completely around his eyes. It was the most terrifying thing that I have ever seen. I couldn't possible let this thing be anywhere around me! (And how is this dude related to the sound? Well, it turns out that he stepped on my cat's tail and the ferocious feline kinda tore his leg to shreds and the sound was just his form of cussing I guess.) Anyway, I had to defeat this evil, monstrosity before me. So, I took out the SECRET WEAPON! Don! Don! Don! Do you know what it is? No? It was DUCT TAPE! That stuff is so powerful, that even this case couldn't stand against it. So, I tackled him! I wrestled him to the ground and sat right on his chest with his face upwards. Then, even thought he was pleading for mercy, I yanked off a chunk of tape off the roll, cut it with my teeth and stuck it right on his head. I repeated the process until not one little hair of his horrendous eyebrows were showing (and this was pretty much his whole face above the lips). 3, 2, 1! I yanked all of the tape off in one swipe! 'FLOOTERDUMPLERINGTONEDECTRIFLINGS!' screamed the dude (Ok, he must be from Mars or something, because his cussing really makes no sense). He clutched his face and looked at me in horror. This is where I fell to the ground laughing because his face was bright red everywhere except for his mouth and chin, and I had also pulled out all of his eyelashes, so his eyes were all puffy and red too. He was so mad that he grabbed the roll of tape and got a fresh piece and chased me all over the neighborhood with it till he gave up and we went to A&W and got a Root Beer Float. The End.

The Day of Love!

Yes, Yes... Valentine's Day is here, so I guess that I will supply you with the wonderful, mushy details that people seem to want when they get on some one's blog. So here I go with the wonderousness that you have all been waiting for! So, now it comes to the men... My COWs (Crushes Of the Week)are these...Master Rick Walker, Nick Batty, Mike Benson, and... *cringe* Nathan Payne. Now, I cringed because there is a super, ultra long story that I need to tell you so you understand, and I don't think that I could because it is mostly just a story of feelings. You know when something feels so right or so weird, or painess or awesome, and you try to explain it to someone, and it just doesn't work. Well, it's a story of feelings. And I'm sure that if you asked him you would get something to a similar effect, but more manly and in painness. So, urg. I have a dramatic love life. Most of which is not good. I am just trying to be this independent, free birdy flying in the sky with nothing ever holding me back, and wouldn't you know it, some dang boy(s) are trying to tie me down. But, today at school, I got a total of six flowers! Yes! One's from Mike Benson, but I paid for half of it and that doesn't count. And yet, it sort of does! One's from Jaiden Hansen (He is so awesome! He got me Phineas and Ferb fruit snacks!), Shawn Robins (Dude, I love that kid! He is so nice!), Skyler Jones (I talked him into that one, but is was ultimately his choice, so...) Eli Johnson, and an anonymous one! I think that one is from Parker Johnson, but I don't really know! How I love high school flowerness! Anyway...end of Krista's Juicy Love Life.

Miss Addie of Whom I Love...

I would love to express my happiness and joyfulness for the amazing KRISTA!!!!!!!! You elaborate my world with happy songbirds, preferably kiwis. You delight my soul and invigorate my life. And.......... NINJA!!! (l:l)-]-< ThE eNd!

Welcome

Every one's a miracle in their own way. Just listen to yourself, not what other people say. When it seems your lost, alone, and feeling down, remember every body's different. Just take a look around. Welcome to wherever you are. This is your life, you've made it this far. Welcome, you've gotta believe that right here right now, is exactly where you're supposed to be. Welcome to wherever you are. Remember that you're perfect. God makes no mistakes.
I absolutely LOVE Bon Jovi. And at 9:38 when I am supposed to be science studying, I have to sing along to this song that popped on iTunes. You know up in the Spunkalicious description, where I sayed that I loved finding the perfect song, well, this is it! Welcome to Wherever You Are!
Oh Oh, and I tooked some awesome pictures of me and bananas! Watch out! Krista the Banana Assassin is in town!

Piano Fantasies (and not so fantasies)

Well, something that anyone should know is that I teach little kids piano lessons. I love it and I think that is so fun and a good way to make easy money, but sometimes I just want to wring this one little girl's neck! Ahh! She is really hard to get around becuase today she kept going, "hey is the lesson done yet? Huh? When is it over" and gracious I tried to be polite as she is only 6 or 7 but still. Ok, now that that is out of my system, I shall tell you the story of a girl by the name of Gilda.
Gilda was a simple girl. She had good friends. She was good grade wise and teachers liked her. She flirted occasionally and was usually liked all around. But Miss Gilda had a dream. She wanted to play the piano with so much awesomeness that no one could deny her as the coolest girl around. You can be nice and stuff, but piano skills officially dubbed you as amazing. So everyday she practiced. She worked so hard with every ounce of work in her. One day she decided to sign up for the talent show and prove to the world that she really was awesome beyond all imagining. So she signed her name on the list. "Gilda burnderschrist" and under the "what's your talent" column she wrote "piano skills galore!". Then the day came. She stood behind the stage with her music in her hand, ready to wow the school. When the announcer man yelled "Glinda! " she walked silently on and sat down. She strummed the whole song with never a mistake. When she was done she stood up and bowed. No one clapped. Becuase the program said "piano skills galore" and Miss Gilda had played a banjo. Moral of the story is, when you want to learn a new instrument, the first step is knowing what is looks like. The End.

I Wonder

Why do people automatically classify themselves and go into a group? Why can't we all just be individuals? We could just hang out with anyone that we want and no one would freak out on anyone. We would just be happy with everyone. I say this because sometimes I just want to break out of every boundary that would ever hold me. So yeah. Plus I think it would be really fun to hang out with an emo and then a jock then a nerd. Just to see the differences. :)

Master Lewis

Right. So, today, when there was nothing else to do, I created my blog. Now, what a blog does for you, I have no idea, except for the bragging rights. "I have a blog! Ha! Do you want to know what my address is? Did you see what I posted yesterday?", stuff like that. So, I think that I shall share with you a story.
This tale begins with a coward. A coward so severe that no one knew even his name because he was too scared to share it with anyone. But for the sake of the story, I shall name him Lewis. Lewis was staring out of his window one day with a dismall look on his mug. His life was just a mess. No one knew him, no one cared for him, but if he were to go out there, all that would happen is he would get hurt or made fun of. Lewis was stuck in the world of nuetral. Too scared to live and therefore uncapable of it. (Wow, that sounded really Socrates! Go put that on your kitchen wall!) As he stared out the window, he watched a chubby boyscout running around the neighborhood trying to sell some random thing that nobody wants for their little fundraisers. Suddenly, he came up to Lewis' house and knock, knock, knocked on the big green door. Timidly, carefully, Lewis opened the door...
Then, at the exact same time, a giant pelican bird flew over a ship in San Francisco Bay and pooped a ginormous poop that landed right on the captains hat. Disgusted he reached up to fling it off, when he lost control of the boat and it hit the lighthouse BANG! And the lighthouse fell straight down right on top of the Golden Gate Bridge which instantly collapsed. This huge impact caused a tidal wave of such enormity that it drenched an airplane that was flying overhead. This airplane, spinning in confusion, (cuz the driver saw little fishies at 1500 ft above sea level) veered way off course and hit the Salt Lake City Capital Building. This building burst into flame, so much so that a hang glider was caught by suprise and flew right to the mountains and crashed. He crashed right into mister Lewis' yard. Then, the glider's shoe propelled off and smacked Lewis right smack dab in the forehead. He lived as he died. The world was just too much for him.